037 - Accidental Free Birth For a First Time Mom (with Leslie Giraudeau)

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SHOW NOTES:

Growing up in a large family, and being married to someone who also grew up in a large family, it only seems fitting that God allows you to start on your large family right away. God is always in the details of our lives, and trusting Him in not only the timing of your pregnancy, but the location that you birth, the delivery of your baby, and everything that happens after as you care for and parent your child is what helped Luke and Leslie along their journey. Listen in today as Leslie shares this very special story of her very first birth, of many to come it sounds like!  

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TRANSCRIPT:

Hi, and welcome to another episode of Surrendered Birth Stories.

Birth Stories, Birth Education, and the Pursuit of Surrendering It All to God.

Let's get started.

Hello everybody.

Happy week, happy day.

Welcome to another podcast.

I'm a little more awake now than I have been this week.

My six-month-old ended up having what I would consider the longest night since he's been born.

He got some kind of baby cold, or I don't know if it was just allergies or what, but it was one of those where whenever you would lay down at night, the mucus would drop into his throat and cause him to cough.

And so he needed to be sitting up, and either my husband or I had to hold him upright on our chest the entire night.

And he ended up waking up still every like 10 or 15 minutes all night long.

It was exhausting.

We took shifts.

So I took the first shift, and I gave him like two, two and a half hours in the middle of the night.

He wouldn't even nurse.

That's the hard part, you know, because nursing that always like fixes everything, but he wouldn't even take the breast, I think just because he was so clogged up.

So I ended up having to pump in the middle of the night.

And I mean, goodness gracious, it was just like the longest night since he's been alive.

So I, I feel like maybe I've recovered a little bit.

My husband gave me a nap yesterday, as in, you know, watch the kids for me so that I could take a nap.

And it was quite lovely and much, much needed, but I've been having a little extra coffee this week, just, just to make it through.

He's doing better now, which is great.

But I mean, that first night, and then the next couple of nights were just, it was hard, but he's happy.

He's healthy now mostly and smiling and we made it through.

So glad you're here.

I'm here to awake now.

And if you haven't left a review of this show yet, that would be amazing.

Reviews really help this show get seen to more people.

And this is most definitely a grassroots effort of a podcast.

Like this is just my husband and I, recording and editing and just trying to get the word out about this podcast through your help, honestly.

So if you could review if you haven't, and then something simple would be to just share this with a friend, just share this with somebody you know who's pregnant, or somebody who is just a mom who's really enjoyed the season of pregnancy and birth, or maybe someone who's thinking about getting ready to start a family.

Just that would be so incredibly helpful.

Send them the link to the show or take a screenshot, share it on your social media, just anything we can do to share this podcast so that other women and families can be impacted for the better.

All right, let's get in to this week's episode.

Growing up in a large family and being married to someone who also grew up in a large family, it only seems fitting that God allows you to start on your large family right away.

God is always in the details of our lives and trusting Him in not only the timing of your pregnancy, but the location that you birth, the delivery of your baby, and everything that happens after, as you care for and parent your child, is what helped Luke and Leslie along their journey.

Listen in today as Leslie shares this very special story of her very first birth, of many to come, it sounds like.

Well, welcome to another episode of Surrendered Birth Stories.

I am your host, Kayla Heater, and I am excited to have, let's call you a fellow student on the podcast today.

She and her husband got to take my birth class last year, and it was such a joy getting to know them.

And now she's here to share her story and how everything went.

So why don't you go ahead and introduce yourself and tell us a little bit about you and your husband and your life.

Yeah, I'm Leslie Giraudeau.

My husband is Luke, and we got married a year ago.

So very newlyweds.

But yeah, so we got married after two months.

We found out we were pregnant, so kind of a whirlwind of things.

But yeah, we live in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, and I've lived here for about three years now, and he's lived here for about two years.

He grew up in Virginia, and I grew up in Honduras as a missionary kid.

So crazy backgrounds, but super thankful to have met each other and be here now.

That's right.

I do remember you saying in the class that this was a very quick pregnancy, like right after you got married.

So when is your wedding anniversary?

January 1st.

Yep.

That's so sweet.

I've always wanted to go to a New Year's Eve wedding.

And it still hasn't happened.

So if anyone out there is planning one and you'd like to invite me, I would love to come.

But I've actually never heard of a New Year's Day wedding.

So that's so fun too.

It's a very easy date to remember.

Exactly.

And growing up in a large family and being married to someone who also grew up in a large family, it always seems fitting that God allows you to start on your large family right away.

When's the next holiday?

That's when we're going to choose of our lives, entrusting Him in not only the timing of your pregnancy, but the location that you birthed, the delivery of your baby, and everything that happens after as you care for and care for your child is what helped Luke and Leslie along their journey.

Yeah, so we had talked about birth control and things before getting married, which I honestly didn't know a lot about.

I knew my mom had never been on birth control.

My sister who had just gotten married also had decided not to do any type of birth control and she was just kind of doing family planning herself.

And I was super nervous about that and I was like, I'm going to get pregnant right away.

This is not going to be good.

And I was like, I'm just going to go and look into some different birth control options.

So I went to a doctor and looked into different options, but I've always had chronic headaches and migraines.

And so she was like, yeah, there's really not a lot of options for you.

You could be at risk of a stroke or blood clots or whatever.

So she gave me like a few options and the ones that she gave me, like after looking into them, I just did not feel comfortable with those.

And honestly, I'm really thankful for the Lord's Providence and all of that, because now knowing what I know about birth control, I'm just really thankful I wasn't even able to get any.

So we kind of just decided like, we're just going to do our best and figure this out.

So we went into it kind of knowing that like, okay, this could happen.

But I think for me, I was still very much like, it's not going to happen.

Like, we're not going to get pregnant right away.

But yeah, two months in, we did.

So that was pretty shocking, but exciting too.

So were you like trying to track your cycle, but you were so new to it, you knew there was a chance you were getting pregnant, or were you just like freewheeling and saying if it happens, it happens?

So I was trying to track it.

I think I just didn't know enough like to know what I was doing.

And I think it was working at the beginning, and then I kind of just was like, I don't know what I'm doing.

And I kind of like was freaking out and just not paying attention to anything.

So yeah, it obviously didn't work.

But now like even after a while, like looking into it and even talking with my sister, because she does the same thing, and seeing how she does it, and I'm like, yeah, I wasn't doing it right.

Like I was just kind of thinking I was and I wasn't.

So yeah, and my husband was wanting to get pregnant right away, so he didn't care at all.

He comes from a huge family, which I do too.

How big are your families?

Yeah, so I have six siblings, he has seven siblings, which is great.

Like we both want a really big family.

And so we knew we wanted a lot of kids.

But I think for him, he was just kind of like, yeah, if this happens right away, like great.

And I was like, yeah, I don't know about that.

That's a lot.

But the Lord had a perfect plan.

So yeah, we're thankful for it.

And how old are you two?

I'm 23 and he's 25.

Okay, well, I mean, good age to start a big family.

Yeah.

So when we found out that was funny, because so I usually was kind of just off with my periods.

Like it was just not super regular.

So it had been like a week and I was like, it's fine.

Like it'll still come, whatever.

And then a couple of days, like after the week, I was like, I'm pregnant.

Like I just like knew it.

I was like, and I don't even want to know.

I was like, I don't want to know right now.

So I like came home from work one day and I like walked in and I was like so quiet.

And he was like, what's going on?

And I was like, I'm pregnant.

And he was like, really?

And I was like, I mean, I don't know, but I'm almost sure I'm pregnant.

He was like, we should take a pregnancy test.

And I was like, I don't want to.

I was like, I really just don't want to know.

And I was like, but at the same time, if I don't know, I probably won't sleep tonight.

So he was like, I'm going to go to the store and get one.

So he went to the store, got one, came back, because he just really wanted to know about it.

So I took it.

And at first, like I just laid it out.

I was like, I don't want to look at it.

Like I was just very much like, it can't be.

But then we like looked at it together.

And he started crying of like happiness.

And I started crying out of like anger.

And I like grabbed the pregnancy test, like threw it across the room.

And he kind of like got shocked at that because he was like, I thought we wanted a big family.

He was like, what's going on?

But it was sweet.

Like the rest of that evening, we just talked a lot, cried a lot.

He really helped me just like think through it and just kind of see where my heart was at.

I think I was being very selfish in a lot of the reasons that I didn't want to have a baby at the moment.

I was just kind of focused on my job.

And like I wanted our marriage to be this like perfect thing.

And he was like, this is not ruining our marriage.

Like this is a good thing.

It's a blessing.

Like the scripture talks about that.

And so that was really helpful for him to just guide me through that.

And even just to see his joy and excitement for it.

So it was definitely a process for me to kind of get there.

But yeah, I was thankful for his leadership in that.

Well, I'm thankful too.

He sounds like a really, I mean, I've met him.

He is a really good guy, but that was definitely the right move.

So how did you go about figuring out what you were going to do in terms of who was going to be your care provider, what type of birth you wanted to have, since it sounds like this was so new for you.

Did you have anything ahead of time that you had in mind, or did you figure it out once you were pregnant?

So growing up, I think it was because my family was big, I had heard about births a lot.

My mom had always done them at a hospital, but naturally.

And that was just kind of how she had done it.

And then my oldest sister has four kids, and she had done that, had done them all naturally at a hospital.

And because we lived in Honduras, that was a very common thing.

People would do it naturally because there's not insurance there, so epidural is just too expensive.

So I just didn't really ever think about meds or epidural or anything.

I kind of already had in mind, I'm going to do this naturally.

Like, I don't know, it was just kind of, that's what people did.

And when I moved here, I just started hearing everyone talk about epidurals.

And I was like, oh, that's so interesting.

Like, no one does that there.

But I also, so before, because I'm a teacher at the moment, but before I became a teacher, I studied to become an EMT.

I was doing that while I was in Honduras, and I had a professor who was teaching me that like all the emergency like birth stuff, if we were like called to a birth.

And he was just kind of talking about how, like obviously there's certain scenarios where it would be very appropriate to put them in the ambulance and take them to the hospital.

But he was like, they're very actually rare to actually have to take them to the hospital.

Like he was like, if they're there and they're just having the baby and freaking out about it, he was like, just help them be comfortable and like help them have the baby.

He was like, they're probably better off trying to have it in their home than getting in an ambulance and like trying to get to the hospital.

So and he also kind of just focused a lot on like, this is what their body is supposed to do.

It's all normal.

It's great.

Like it'll work out.

And even just saying like he was just very adamant about like, you're also not delivering the baby.

He was like, that person is delivering the baby, like the mom.

Like you have no part in it.

You're just there to make sure everything's okay.

So I think even having that perspective from him was like helpful, because I was like, wow, like people can just do this at home and like people can just do this naturally and it's not dangerous.

Like it's fine.

So that kind of contributed to me thinking like, I just want to do it at home.

And I hadn't really heard of home births, but I was like, that just sounds a lot better.

I don't like hospitals.

Like I don't want to go to a hospital.

But then I, I don't remember where exactly.

I think it was like an influencer or something.

And I heard of like had a home birth.

And this was still when I was like 19, 20.

And I heard about it.

And I was just always like, someday I'm going to have a home birth.

And I was like, I just love that idea.

It sounds great.

And everyone like in my family was just kind of like, yeah, yeah, you say that now.

But like once you're pregnant, you're not going to do that.

But yeah, when I found out I was pregnant, after the whole shock and everything, I like told my husband, I told Luke, I was like, and by the way, like I really want to have a home birth.

And thankfully, he was like, okay, sounds good.

I was like, great.

I was like, that could have been a lot harder.

But he actually knew people who had done it.

So that was really helpful because he had some like friends he had grown up with who had done it.

So that I think just kind of gave him a piece about it.

So at the time, even though I knew I wanted to do a home birth, I didn't really know how to go about that.

So I just knew I had to find like some doctors.

So I went to the same doctor that I had talked to about like birth control.

I was like, I'll just go to her for now and see how that goes.

And then I'll figure out the whole Homer stuff.

So I started going to her and she was very kind, very helpful and everything.

But it was just so different from what I had heard of like my mom and my sister experiencing.

Because even though they went to a doctor there in Honduras, he was very personal, spent a lot of time talking to them.

And like when I went to this doctor, it was like every time it was a different doctor, and they were always asking who I was and like how things were going.

Like it just seemed like very impersonal.

And so I was like, yeah, I definitely don't want to do this.

Like I already kind of had that in mind, but then even having that bit of experience, I was like, yeah, I don't want to do this at a hospital.

And so I started talking to one of my friends at church.

Her name is Jennifer.

She had done a home birth and our husbands are actually in seminary together.

So that was a cool connection and they got pregnant at like two months too.

So it was cool to just like see all those connections, but she had done a home birth.

So we went and talked to them about it.

And she kind of walked me through like, here are some different ways to go about it.

And like, here are some midwives and whatever.

So I started like reaching out to a midwife.

And it took a super long time at first because I was just kind of skeptical about like, I just don't know if I'm doing this right.

Like, I want to do a home birth, but also like, I've never done this before.

And what if it isn't a good idea?

And a lot of people around me, because that's not normal, were like, yeah, you're kind of crazy.

What are you thinking?

But I just kept reaching out to this midwife and I was texting her a lot and I was like, I just need to reach out to her.

Like, eventually, maybe she'll get back.

And it was kind of even just me thinking like, if she reaches back, then like, I think this is the Lord's like direction towards that.

But we were at like, maybe 18 weeks and she still hadn't reached back.

So I was like, I don't know, like, I'm almost halfway.

Like, she hasn't reached back yet.

Like, I don't know if I should like start looking to other things or what I should do.

So we actually when we started going to your birth class, we started even looking into a birthing center because you talked about that.

And we like that idea too.

And I was like, maybe that would work.

Like, we can just go there.

And I was just kind of at the point to where I was like, I just want to check this off my list and know that like I have this figured out.

But I remember I was like, maybe I just need to call the midwife like instead of texting her.

Maybe she's just not reading it.

So after a couple of weeks, I was like, I just need to figure this out.

If she doesn't answer and like this doesn't work out, we'll just do the birthing center.

So we ended up calling her and she answered and right away was like, yeah, we can schedule you for this day like totally fine.

And I was like, oh, perfect.

It's like that was a lot easier than I thought.

Yeah.

That particular midwife, I know who you're talking about, gets like 150 text messages a day.

And so there's just no way she has time to check all of them.

So a lot of times she'll tell people, if you really need to get in touch with me, you have to call me.

She's like, I cannot go through 150 text messages a day.

So yeah.

So I'm glad you called her.

That worked out well.

Yeah, no, it was great.

And it was so easy from there.

I think I was just, I kept thinking, like, I just, this needs to work.

Like, I don't know how.

But so once we met her and like went to an appointment with her, it was like super obvious.

Like, oh yeah, we love her.

We love how much experience she has.

And even just like she was a believer.

And so that was super helpful.

Just knowing like, okay, like she loves the Lord just as much as we do.

And like wants to take care of our baby and sees it like that.

It's not just some random physician who's like, oh yeah, you're just another person on my list.

Like I honestly don't even remember who you are, you know?

So it was just really sweet.

And like we would spend like hours with her like in the appointments.

And it was always just really nice.

Like even just the questions she would ask were just a lot more personal than just like, how are you feeling?

No questions?

Okay, great.

You know, like it was just very much like, tell us like about your mom and about your like sisters and about your families and what you're doing right now.

Like everything was just building a relationship.

So that was really sweet.

I mean, we enjoyed that.

And so we started going to her.

Yeah.

That just sounds, I mean, obviously I've experienced it, but it is it just when you when you talk about the two right next to each other, like five minute appointments, not knowing who you are.

Okay, do you have any questions by compared to sitting down, you know, for an hour or more and just really developing that relationship with the person who's going to be with you on the most important day in most like vulnerable moment of your life?

Yeah, no, it was definitely and that was a big thing for me.

I was like, I want to feel very comfortable with the person who's going to be there.

I want to feel like they're my friend, like not just a random person who walked in and like caught my baby.

Like I was like, that's just so sad.

Like this is such an important moment in our lives.

And to think that it would just be like a stranger or somebody that I've talked to like twice, like is just not super appealing.

So yeah, it was sweet to get to know her.

And she's just very like, I don't know, like the questions she asked were always very helpful too.

Like they would make me like leave and be like, oh, I should probably be eating this more or like thinking more about that.

Or like it just helps me do better things in my pregnancy too.

And not just like, oh yeah, I'm healthy.

So whatever.

Like it was always like, hey, maybe you should try this or that.

And it was like, oh yeah, maybe I should, you know.

So it was really, really helpful.

So how did your pregnancy go then?

Like was it smooth?

Were there any bumps in the road?

Yeah, so I feel like it was pretty smooth, especially with like the other stories I've heard.

I was super tired most of the time.

Like I think that was like the biggest thing for me.

I already have like pretty low like iron levels, so that kind of just like affected a lot.

And thankfully, they didn't ever get to a point where they were like dangerously low, but it was just like super exhausted all the time.

At the beginning, I got a little bit nauseous, but honestly, it was not bad.

I only threw up a couple of times, so that was a huge blessing.

Second trimester was like nothing.

Like it was totally fine.

I kind of like would forget I was pregnant sometimes.

And then third trimester was fine.

Like it was just kind of, again, the tiredness really hit in.

And I would get like really sore ribs.

Like that was one of my like biggest things.

I think my baby was just really long, and he would stretch himself out a lot.

So I would like feel him like kicking my ribs all the time.

So that was definitely like the hardest part.

But honestly, it was really, really seamless.

That sounds nice.

And especially if you plan on having more, then that's great.

Yeah, no, it was exciting, I think, for both me and my husband because we knew we wanted a lot of kids.

And so kind of experiencing a good pregnancy was like, okay, like, we can do this, you know?

And I think honestly, the hardest thing for me aside from like, because the physical things weren't that bad, was more like the emotional part of just like, all right, I'm pregnant, this is a good thing.

And I really just wanted to feel like I was going to be okay in it.

The first trimester was a lot of just like back and forth of like, why am I pregnant?

And just kind of frustration.

But then the more like set in, I was like, this is such a blessing.

I need to just see what the Lord is doing in my life and see how he's growing me and stretching me through this.

And I think even just seeing how he was growing our marriage and that because that was one of my biggest fears.

I was kind of like, oh, this is going to ruin our marriage and like change everything.

But it just made it so much sweeter and we just grew so much closer.

And even just seeing my husband like step in a lot to help me when I needed it and like take a lot of like just the load off of me so that I could rest and just be prepared for the next day or whatever.

Like it was just really, really sweet.

So it was hard in that aspect, but it was sweet that we were able to grow through that.

I bet it really does.

Pregnancy and childbirth can really bring you closer with your husband so much.

Like, I mean, just personally speaking, but it's definitely, I feel like, one of the most bonding experiences you can go through.

Yeah, no, we loved it.

We were like, wow, we can do this again.

This is nice.

Yeah.

So then, okay, how did the end of the pregnancy go?

And then how did you end up going into labor?

Yeah, so I was pretty healthy like the entire time, which was, again, such a blessing.

And so like closer to the end, even just the appointments were like, all right, like, yep, we're just kind of waiting, like everything's looking good.

And he was always head down and always like in a great position and whatever.

So that was just exciting.

Did you know he was a boy?

Yeah, we found out pretty early on, I think.

That was one of the things I was like, all right, like I found out I was pregnant, kind of discouraged about that, but I was like, but I will find out.

I was like, this will help me keep going.

And I really wanted a boy.

So I was like, super excited about that.

So yeah, we knew he was a boy from like, I think, like 15 weeks we had found out.

Yeah, we were super excited about that.

We had like chosen the name and everything.

So I was still working at the school and had told them like, I wanted to finish out the semester if I could.

He was due the 24th of December.

And last day of school was the 15th of December.

So I was like, all right, like I should be able to make it till then.

Most people go way over.

So like, I'm just going to expect that, which was, I think it was helpful for me to kind of set my mind even on a later date.

Like I put in my mind like, no, I'm not going to have the baby till the 28th.

Like for some reason, I was just like, I'm just going to choose the 28th as like the day I'm going to have the baby.

So I just like set my mind on that.

And I think it was also helpful that I was working a lot and just kind of really trying to focus on that.

So once I finished on December 15th, I was kind of like, all right, this baby can come whenever now.

Like I was like, I'm ready, like we're good.

So that was a Friday.

And then Saturday, I was like, all right, now I just need to really prepare.

So the nesting really hit in, and I was deep cleaning the house, totally just organizing everything and getting everything ready.

And my mother-in-law had planned a nesting party on that Monday so that we could also make a bunch of frozen foods and whatever.

She was just like, let's just do a bunch of things to keep you distracted and get you prepared.

And I was like, perfect.

So I was just getting the whole house ready, and maybe that put me into labor.

Honestly, I don't know.

But that night, I felt so exhausted.

It was just different than I had felt throughout the whole pregnancy.

I was just like, I can't even keep my eyes open.

I was like, I can't even walk.

I'm just so exhausted.

And you were 38 weeks?

At that point, I was going to be 39 the next day.

So this was Saturday, Sunday, I was going to be 39 weeks.

So I was super exhausted.

And it was hard to because that whole week, I had been really sick with a cold and a really bad cough that was just lingering.

And I was like, hopefully this will go away before he comes.

And it was getting better.

But then that night, it was really, really bad.

And I was just coughing and sneezing and blowing my nose.

It was just not good.

And I was like, I think I'm just super exhausted because I'm sick.

So I just need to go to bed.

And at that point, it was also just harder to sleep because you're big and uncomfortable.

And again, my ribs were always really hurting.

So I was just switching sides all the time.

And at like 2 a.m.

on Sunday morning, 2 a.m., I woke up and went to the bathroom.

I was just blowing my nose over and over again because I was just so sick.

And I usually, when I get sick, get bloody noses because I'm just blowing my nose so much.

So I just kept having a bloody nose, and I was like, this is just so annoying.

I'm just so tired.

I just want to go back to sleep.

But then I went to the bathroom, and I think I was just so out of it that when I wiped, I saw blood.

And I was like, was that my nose?

I was like, I don't know.

So I was just like, it's probably just my nose, and I'm overthinking it, and I don't remember what I did.

So I was like, I'm just going to go back to sleep.

So I did.

And then I was kind of just in and out of sleep throughout the whole night, just from sickness and whatever.

But whenever I would like wake up, I did feel a little bit like crampy.

But I was like, this is nothing.

You're overthinking it because you want to be in labor, and because you finished work now, and you're like wanting this now.

But at like 4-ish, like 4 a.m., I woke up again and like went to the bathroom, and it was like definitely like not my nose.

And I was like, all right, like I'm definitely like this is starting.

And I was like, I don't think it's like there's contractions yet.

I was like, but this is definitely like starting.

So it was like mucus plug type bloody show stuff.

Yeah, yeah.

And so I think I was a little bit like, I think this is my mucus plug.

But I was also just like, I've never been through this.

Like, I don't know.

I was like, but there's something going on.

And so I just kind of like sat there for a bit.

And then I hear Luke, my husband, he was like outside the door, and he just goes, what's going on in there?

And I was like, nothing, I'm fine.

And he was like, no, you're not.

What's going on?

And I was like, yeah, he was, I was like, no, no, I'm just sick.

And he goes, you're just sick.

He was like, what's going on?

And I was like, there's just a lot of stuff.

He was like, what do you mean by that?

And he was pretty calm, but he just kind of knew something was going on.

And I was like, just a lot of stuff, you know, coming out of me.

And he was like, okay.

He was like, that's good.

Like, are you feeling any contractions?

And I was like, I don't think so.

Like, I don't really know.

And I was like, but I just know I don't want to go back to sleep anymore.

I was like, I'm tired of like thinking that maybe something's happening and then like not knowing and just like trying to sleep and whatever.

So he was like, that's fine.

And I was like, but I don't want to be like awake alone.

And he was like, that's fine.

Like, we'll just stay awake.

So we lied in bed and after probably like an hour, I definitely like was like, okay, yeah, I'm feeling like a little bit crampy and then it like stops and then it comes again.

So I was like, yeah, these are definitely contractions.

I was like, but this could last for like a week.

I was like, I have no idea how long this could be.

And he was very much in like the same boat of just like, yeah, like who knows, let's just take it slow.

And since it was Sunday, we were like, let's just go to church and like do our normal day.

So I texted my midwife at that point and just told her, hey, like I lost my mucus plug this morning.

And I've been kind of having slight contractions.

I was like, they're not bad at all.

I'm fine.

I was like, we're just like hanging out.

And so we like lied in bed for a while, read our Bible, just kind of took it really slow, which was really sweet.

And then I was like, I'm really hungry.

I should probably eat a lot.

So he, my husband got up and made omelets and like hash browns and what it was great.

It was a great meal to start out the day.

But we, so he started doing that and I was super convinced that I needed to make these protein balls for like a snack for labor.

Like I was just kind of like, I need to do this.

So I like started doing that.

And like, meanwhile, I would like do that and then like be on like the birth ball, like bouncing up and down, like, yeah, this feels really good.

Like everything's going great.

And at this point, it's like 6 a.m.

And still like it was kind of there, but not really.

We weren't timing anything.

I was just kind of like, yep, this is just how it goes.

And so with all of that, my mom, who still lives in Honduras, and my dad, they had just landed the night before.

They had come on the 16th, and they were going to see us at church.

Like we hadn't seen them yet.

So she texts me and she's like, hey, like, can't wait to see you guys at church.

Like, whatever.

Like, hope you guys are doing great.

And so at that point, it was like 6 or 7, and I was like, you know, these are starting to feel like pretty uncomfortable.

I was like, I'm not in pain.

I was like, but I'm just uncomfortable, and I don't know if I really want to go to church, but I think I should because I want to distract myself.

But we were also supposed to teach Sunday school that day, and I was like, I definitely don't think I should teach Sunday school.

So I wrote like the leaders in charge of that, and I was like, hey, I think I've like gone into labor.

I was like, nothing crazy, but I probably just shouldn't teach Sunday school today.

So they were like, yeah, no worries.

Like, we'll get someone to cover for you.

So I started getting ready for church, and I was like doing my makeup and like picking out my outfit, whatever.

And then I was starting to have to like stop more for each one, like just stop and like kind of breathe.

And I was like, man, these are uncomfortable.

Like this is not fun.

And at this point, it's kind of like 8 a.m.

And so Luke is like, let's just not go.

He was like, we can still make the day normal.

He was like, maybe we just shouldn't be at church because you're not going to be paying attention.

Like, neither am I.

He was like, we're just going to be like, our minds are going to be elsewhere, and we're probably just not going to be helpful.

And so I was like, yeah, that's probably a good idea.

So we talked to my mom about it and said, hey, like, we're not going to go to church.

I've started like early labor.

And so we called her and she like texted the whole family about that and like said, yeah, like she started early labor.

So did you want her to text everybody?

At first, no.

I was like, she said, we should text everyone that you're going into labor.

And I was like, I don't really want people to like be asking me a bunch of questions because it's going to take a long time and whatever.

And she was like, I think it'd be good for people to pray for you.

And I was like, yeah, that's true.

It's like I do need a lot of prayer.

And so she was like, let's just do that.

And so she texted my family all about it.

And she also just said, she was like, we're really tired because we just got in last night.

And I think we're just not going to go to church either.

She was like, if you want, I can come over and be with you.

And I was like, yeah, that's fine.

With all of this, my mom has had seven kids, but she is a worrier.

She just is very worst case scenario type of person.

And so with me planning the home birth and everything, she had been very encouraging through it all, but she had also just said, hey, I'm trusting you with this decision.

I'm trusting the Lord through all of this.

But she was like, but I am really nervous for you.

And she just kind of put that out there.

She was like, I know that you guys are adults.

You can make your own decisions.

And I trust the Lord in this process.

But we're just going to let you know that we are nervous and really praying for you, whatever.

And so I had kind of gone back and forth within my pregnancy of whether I wanted her to be there or not.

But I really wanted my sisters to be there.

And so I had communicated that with them.

And I had said, I can't have you guys not invite my mom.

That's just not right.

And so I was like, maybe you guys can just be there and let me know if she's really worrying or if I just need her to leave.

Maybe you guys can just kind of step in.

And they were like, yeah, that's fine.

Which she was very aware of, too.

She was even kind of like, yeah, I don't know if I want to be there.

She was like, I've been at birth before, but not for my own daughter.

She was like, that's just different.

So she was nervous about it.

She was like, I can come and at least be with you through labor.

And she was like, but I might not stay for the birth.

And I was like, yeah, that's fine.

Do whatever you need to.

And I have, so because we're seven kids, I have family all over.

So one of my sisters was in Virginia at the time.

The other one was in DC.

So they were both on their way.

So I was kind of hoping, okay, maybe they'll get there at the same time as my mom, and we'll all just be able to do this.

So at the time, it's just me and my husband there.

And I'm like, all right, like, yeah, just come over whenever.

We're good.

And as I'm calling everyone and texting people and whatever, I'm like, no worries.

This takes forever.

I was like, this is only the beginning.

This is going to take a good long while.

No rush.

And I was just very much like, this is probably going to be tomorrow, if anything.

I was like, I do not think it's going to happen today.

So I just kind of kept going through contractions, and they really weren't bad.

I was mostly doing them on the birthing ball.

We put on The Sound of Music, the movie, and we were watching that.

So that was fun.

We were just hanging out.

And then it started getting to the point probably around nine, where I was needing Luke to support me more.

So each time I was having to either tell him, okay, it's coming now, can you help me just breathe through this and go through it, whatever.

And he was so supportive.

It was so cool to see him in that.

And either he would rub my back or my hips, or I would grab on to him at least, just so I could hold on to something.

And it wasn't painful.

Again, it was just interesting.

It just felt like a really bad cramp.

And in some ways, it was weird, because it is a really bad cramp, but it's only for a short period of time.

So it's like, oh, it's gone now.

I'm fine.

So I was going through that while we were watching the movie, whatever.

And then it got to the point where I was like, I just don't want to watch the movie anymore.

I was like, I just need to focus on this.

And I was like, but I really don't want to focus on it.

I was like, if I start focusing on it, I might just start kind of just getting too exhausted.

But I was like, but I'm at the point where I feel like I need to focus on this.

And I texted my friend who had done the home birth before, I texted Jennifer, and I said, hey, things have started up.

Would you want to be here?

I think that would be really cool.

I was like, none of my sisters or family have been through this, so it might be helpful for someone to be there who has done this before.

And she was super excited.

She was like, yeah, I'll be there.

And she was like, when do you want me to be there?

And I was like, don't worry, take your time, go to church, whatever, come after.

So she was like, all right, sounds good.

But then she started asking me more questions.

She was like, how far apart are the contractions?

And I was like, oh, they're probably two minutes apart and 45 seconds long.

Because at that point, Luke had started timing them, which I was also very adamant about.

I was like, don't time them, I don't want to focus on this.

But he was like, I'm going to start timing them.

And I was like, all right, whatever.

Because I think for men, it's just kind of like, they only know certain things that they can help with.

And he's like, this is something I can help with.

He's like, I'm going to time them.

So he started timing them.

And I was like, don't time them.

I don't want to know, whatever.

But then I told her and she was like, oh, what are you having to do for them?

Are you vocalizing?

Whatever.

And I was like, and then when she texted me that, I was like, well, I haven't done that yet.

But I was like, maybe on the next one I'll try that.

Because I am having a hard time breathing because I was still really sick.

So my nose was still all stopped up.

And it was really hurting my throat to try to breathe through each one.

So I started vocalizing on the next one.

And I was like, oh, wow, that feels really good.

I was like, I'm going to do that again.

So I texted her back and I was like, yeah, I'm vocalizing.

I was like, it feels a lot better that way.

So I think she reached out to the midwife because it's the same midwife she has.

And she was like, hey, have you reached back out to Leslie?

And asked how things are going.

And she was like, no, I haven't heard anything.

And she was like, I think she's progressing pretty quickly.

Maybe you should reach out.

So my midwife texted me and she's like, how are things going?

And I was like, they're getting pretty intense, but we're good.

I was like, we're fine.

And honestly, my mentality was still very much like, this is not happening yet.

There's so much more to go.

And I was like, this pain is not that bad.

I was like, it's going to get so much worse than this.

And so I just kept kind of pushing it to like, this isn't bad.

It's going to be worse.

Which is a good mentality to have.

Yeah, I think it was really, really helpful.

And obviously, I had no idea how bad it would get.

So it was just really helpful for me to be like, it's going to get so terrible where I can't even take it anymore.

And I was like, right now, I'm fine.

I can do this right now.

So I was like, at that point, I kind of didn't want to be on the birth ball anymore.

She was texting me and just asking me like a bunch of different questions, and eventually just like called and I like gave the phone to Luke because I was like vocalizing almost through every contraction at that point.

And so he answers and she's like, hey, how are things going?

And he's like, we're good.

Yeah, like she's just going through the contractions.

And she was like, all right, do you guys feel like I should go ahead and come?

And she lives like an hour from us.

So he looks at me and at the time I'm like standing in the doorway, because I was kind of just up and down at that point moving around.

So I was standing in the doorway and he looks at me and I was like, no, I don't want her to come.

It's like, I really don't want that right now because I didn't want her to come and just like sit there and wait.

Plus, I think I was just, which I talked to her about this actor and she said she wouldn't have done it anyway.

But she was, I said like, I really didn't want to be checked.

I didn't want her to get there and be like, oh, you're only three centimeters dilated.

And she was like, if you didn't want that, I wouldn't have done it.

And I was like, oh, well, good to know.

But at the time, I had no idea.

I thought she's just going to come and check me and tell me I'm not progressing and I don't need that right now.

So I was just kind of like, I don't want her to come.

So I told Luke, I was like, no, just tell her that we're good.

We're fine.

And then at that moment, another contraction hit.

And she heard me through the phone and she told Luke, she was like, I'm going to go ahead and come.

And he was like, all right, sounds good.

He's like, whatever you think is best.

And so he hangs up and he's like, I'm going to go fill up the pool with water.

And I was like, don't do that yet.

I was like, it's going to just take so long and the water is going to get all cold.

And there's going to be no point for you having filled it up, whatever.

And he's like, I'm just going to do it.

So he just goes and starts filling it up with water.

And I'm mostly like laboring on my bed at that point.

I tried one contraction laying down, hated it.

I thought that was terrible, which kind of just made me think, like, how do women do this in a hospital?

Like, but I like immediately was like, that was bad.

I don't want to get stuck in that position again.

So I was mostly on like all fours or like standing up and just trying to like move around.

And then I would like pause with each contraction, but mostly like all fours and I would even put like pillows like under my belly.

I was not having back labor, but I was definitely feeling a lot in my hips.

So like Luke was rubbing them a lot.

I had like a heating pad and that felt really good.

But even within all that, I still was like, there's so much left.

And so at one point I told Luke, I was like, I'm just such a wimp.

I was like, I cannot believe like I'm at the beginning.

And it's hurting me so bad.

I was like, I mean, I'm fine.

But it's not nice.

I was like, this is really uncomfortable.

And he was like, no, we'll just figure this out.

You're going to be okay.

And I've always been told I have a very high pain tolerance.

So I was like, I can't believe I've been told that.

And now I'm like wimping out.

And I'm doing terrible.

But at the same time, I just kept kind of thinking through all the things that I had been researching or learning and just trying to...

I kept hearing people say, just let the contractions do what they're supposed to do.

Let your body just go with it.

And so each time I followed a contraction, I was like, I just need to let go and not tense up and really just take it slow and whatever.

And so at that point, I moved into the room where we had the pool set up and we had a sofa in there, so I was laboring on that sofa.

And while all that was happening, my midwife had reached out to Jennifer and said, hey, I'm on my way.

You should go ahead and head over there because she does seem to be progressing pretty quick.

So Jennifer, instead of going to church, just came to my house.

And this was all probably around 11-ish.

And so she came in and was just like, hey, how's it going?

And I was like, I'm fine.

Like, we're good.

She was like, let me know if I can help you with anything, like pain wise.

And I was like, I think I'm good.

My hips are just really bothering me.

And she was like, OK.

So I was like kind of on a break at that point.

And so she starts helping Luke fill up the tub.

And he had it connected to where our laundry, our washers connected.

And it was for some reason, the heat, like the hot water was just not working.

It was only cold water.

So he was like, I'm just going to fill it up with cold water, but like start dumping in like hot water to the pool.

So she's like helping him do that.

Like they're getting hot water on the stove and just like pouring it into the pool.

I'm going through some contractions.

She helps me through one by like pressing on my hips, which felt really good.

And then like right after she did that, I was like, I need to go to the bathroom.

And so I like went to the bathroom.

And I think my mindset was like, because I knew that like when you're in labor, you kind of are just like getting rid of everything that's inside of you.

And I really didn't want to throw up.

So I was like, the more I go to the bathroom, the better and the faster it will go.

So I went to the bathroom and I like sat down and I was like, I feel like I'm going to poop out of watermelon.

Exactly.

It was crazy.

And like the moment I felt that was like, I've heard that from so many people before.

And I was like, oh, no, it's like I need to push out the baby.

So I like immediately stand up.

I was like, I'm not going to have my baby in the toilet.

Like I just like did not want that.

So I stood up immediately and I was like called for Luke and I was like, I need to push.

And he was like, okay.

And he just like, he was like, do you want to do it here?

And I was like, no, I want to go to the other room.

And so we go to the room where like we had planned to do it.

And Jennifer follows along and I was like, I want to get in the water.

I really want to have this baby in the water.

And so she's like, okay, but it's really cold still.

And so I put like my foot in and I was like, yeah, it is.

I don't want to get in there.

So I like move over to like the other side of the room and she starts setting up like pads all over the floor.

And she's like, that's fine.

It's okay.

We're going to have the baby right here.

And I was like, I don't want to have it here.

I want to have in the water.

And she was like, it's cold.

Like, I don't know what to tell you.

So I started, I was standing up and I was grabbing on to Luke's neck and kind of just like he was like sustaining me in that moment.

And I like kind of pushed, but then I like did not like how it felt at all.

Like I was like, this is super painful.

And I was like, I can feel myself tearing.

Like I was like, I just know if I do this, I'm going to tear.

And I really don't want to tear.

So I was like, I just need to get in the water.

Like, I don't care if it's cold.

So I got in the water and I was like not, I was not on my knees.

I was like squatting.

And Luke was on the outside of the pool and I was grabbing on to his neck still.

And went through a couple contractions where like I felt pushy, but didn't like quite push yet.

And then on one of them, Jennifer was like, you need to push like in the next one.

And I was like, okay.

So I pushed, but then I like couldn't, I was just like, I can't do this.

Like nothing happened, so I was just like, I started freaking out and I was like, what if I'm wrong?

Like a whole bunch of things just started running through my head of like, the midwife's not here.

I might not be fully dilated.

Like no one knows at this point like what's going on.

I was like, I might just think I need to push and like maybe I don't.

But then she looks at me and she's like, yes, you can do this.

You're made to do this.

She was like, you're going to be okay.

And so I was like, okay.

And then like the next contraction, I like pushed and his head came out, which was really nice.

So and I like felt that and I just was like, okay, his head came out.

And they're like, wow, okay, great.

And so at that moment, my mom actually came in.

So we hadn't even kept in contact with her like this whole time.

She had just said she was going to come.

And then we had just like progressed through labor.

And then she comes in.

And it was actually funny because she walked in with my dad and had told him, like, come with me because I don't know how I'll be like reacting with everything.

She was like, so if I'm not doing well, like just tell me to come out and like, we'll wait outside.

And so she walked in, but it was kind of just happening so fast that she was like, it doesn't matter.

Like I have to just be here now.

So she walks into the room and I was like in between a contraction.

So I was just like, hey, like, thanks for being here.

Like, so good to see you.

Like I was like totally fine.

And she's just like crying.

Like she was just like weeping and like so excited.

And she looks at Jennifer and she's like, are you the midwife?

And she's like, no, I'm just a friend.

And my mom is like, oh, okay.

Like kind of freaking out.

But at the same time, just like, here we are.

Like we have to do this.

So then Jennifer tells Luke, she's like, do you want to catch the baby?

And he's like, yes, I really want to catch the baby.

So she's like, all right, like we'll switch spots then.

So she starts, I start grabbing onto her neck and like she's like sustaining me at that point.

And he jumps in his pool like behind me.

And so she's like, all right, in this next contraction, like you're going to have your baby.

And I was like, all right.

Which like she's not a midwife in all this, but it was just like really sweet that she was like doing all of that.

So then I pushed again and his whole body came out.

And it was funny because when I felt it come out, I was like, and I didn't know because I've never had a baby, but I was like, it just feels very jello-y.

Like it was like, it doesn't feel very hard.

Like nothing feels like his head.

Like, I don't know, it just felt weird.

But it made more sense after because Luke, when he caught the baby, he felt something like burst.

And so because my water hadn't broken in all this.

So yeah, like the water broke like right then, which was really cool because I did get to have him in my sack.

But I think that helped a lot too, with just not having as much pain and everything.

So he was able to like catch him and felt that and then lifted him up.

And he immediately started crying.

And I like turned around because at that point I was like not facing him.

So I turned around and like it was just like pure like shock.

Like I was just like, whoa, like we just had a baby.

And it was also just like so fun because immediately I was like, wow, he's beautiful.

Like he is so beautiful.

And it was a kind of an ongoing joke throughout my whole pregnancy between me and my husband.

We were like, our baby is not going to make you.

We were like, we just need to prepare ourselves.

We were like, if our baby is not cute, that's fine.

We're still going to love him and whatever.

We were just kind of joking about it.

And then we both looked at each other and I was like, he's beautiful.

And he was like, yeah.

We were like, whoa.

And he wasn't because the water had just broken, he was also very clean.

He didn't have anything on him.

So I think that also just shocked me because I kind of expected to see him covered in a bunch of gunk and whatever.

And he was just like perfectly clean.

And I was like, wow, this is amazing.

So they passed him to me and I held him on my chest.

And it was just like so surreal.

I was just like, wow, what just happened?

And it was like so fast that I couldn't even necessarily be emotional.

I was just kind of like in shock.

And then since the water was all really cold, Jennifer was like, how about you get out of the water and we'll move you onto the sofa?

Because there was a sofa in there.

And so as I was getting up, I felt something drop.

And I was like, maybe that was my placenta.

I don't know.

But I was like, it doesn't matter.

I just had a baby.

And I think it was shocking to me too, because as soon as I had him, contractions just completely stopped and pain just completely was gone.

And I was like, whoa.

In a split second, everything is fine.

And even just like, I remember as I was stepping out of the pool, so many of my friends had told me, hey, right after you have the baby, you're probably not going to want to have a lot of babies.

You're probably going to be like, I can't have any more kids, because you are in all that pain and whatever.

But my friends had been saying, once you have a couple months down the road, you'll want more kids.

But I was stepping out of the pool, and I remember being like, this was fine.

I could do this a bunch of times.

I was like, this was great.

That was awesome.

I was like, I don't even remember pain.

And this was minutes after I just had him.

I just didn't remember feeling anything.

It was just kind of like, this is fine.

We can do this.

This is great.

So I got onto the sofa, and they just put a blanket over me and everything.

And at that point, my midwife had actually called another midwife who lives really close to me and said, hey, she's pushing.

Because Jennifer had texted the midwife saying, she's pushing, she's going to have this baby now.

So because my midwife was still on her way, she called this other midwife and was like, hey, can you just go and make sure everything's good?

This is a first time mom, whatever.

So that midwife walked in after I got on the sofa.

So she came in, and I didn't know her, but it was totally fine.

She was super sweet and immediately was like, sorry, you don't know me, but I'm just here to help out.

You guys are all alone, whatever.

And I was like, no worries.

I'm just glad that we have our baby.

So she came and started checking, just to see if I had delivered the placenta, and she was like, hey, I'm going to tug a little bit on this.

If it hurts, let me know.

So she tugged, and then immediately it just came out.

And so that was super nice too, because I know for many people, it takes a long time, or they kind of have to go through contractions again, or whatever.

But for me, it was just like, immediately it just came out.

So that was a huge blessing, because I remember thinking, great, do I have to go through more?

I was like, that was perfect.

I don't want to go through anything else.

And so I was just super thankful for that.

So she got out of the placenta and just started checking in.

She was like, yeah, everything looks really great.

She was like, we'll just wait for a while, and then eventually when it stops pulsating or whatever, we'll cut it.

But this whole time, I had baby Theo, and it was just really sweet, because he was just with me.

And at that point, my dad came in, and my younger sisters were there, too, so they came in, and my mother-in-law came in.

So a bunch of people started arriving at that moment.

He was already born, but they started arriving.

And I just had him for almost two hours maybe or more, and nobody had gotten him at that point.

And it was just so sweet that I got to spend all that time with him.

And he started nursing immediately, which was just kind of shocking to me, because I was like, I don't know how he's doing this or what's going on, but it's working and it's great.

So it was just really, really sweet.

And probably 30 minutes after I had him, my midwife arrived and she was just really sweet.

She came in and she was like, hey, super proud of you.

You did a great job.

How are you feeling?

Whatever, very just calm about everything, very sweet.

And it wasn't anything where I was like, you should have been here.

It was just kind of like, this is just what happens.

And we were just super thankful that everything did go smoothly and that the Lord protected me and protected the baby and made everything go so well and even just helped my husband be calm and all because he never freaked out.

He was just kind of there through it all.

And he said, in his mind, he was trembling.

He was like, I had no idea.

The midwife wasn't here.

We didn't, anything could have happened.

But we're just so, so thankful that it was just such a smooth process.

And yeah, very fast for first time birth.

But it was also just so, so sweet.

So yeah.

I'm still picturing the tub.

So you said you were squatting in the tub and leaning on Jennifer.

Your arms around Jennifer, but you were in the tub?

Yeah.

So I was in the tub squatting and leaning over the front.

How high was the water?

Not very high.

It was midway.

But high enough for him to be born in it?

Yeah.

So it was kind of just like, I feel like it was probably up to my hips, but I was squatting in it.

So yeah, I wasn't really in the water.

So yeah, and it did help a lot.

I didn't feel a lot of pain because of the water, which was super, super nice.

And when I was pushing, it wasn't as terrible as the one push that I did outside of the water.

So once I got in, I just felt like, okay, I can push and it's not as painful.

So that was really nice.

But yeah, so I was squatting, and then she was kind of holding me up.

So she was crouched down on the outside of the pool, and then Luke was behind me.

And so when the baby came out, he caught him and then just passed him under my leg again so that the placenta, because he was still attached to the placenta, so then I just grabbed him and pulled him to my chest.

So, yeah.

You did it.

First time mom, unassisted birth.

I mean, I know Jennifer was there, but technically no licensed midwife was there.

Yeah.

No, it was crazy.

And I think still we just see the kindness of the Lord in it all, because you hear of all these different things that could happen.

And even when we were deciding to do a home birth, I think one of the things that really helped us was, and we had to just be very straightforward with each other when me and Luke were talking about it.

And we both commented, if the Lord has planned for us to lose a baby, or in that birth process for something to happen, I was like, it would happen at the hospital regardless.

It's not like we have to just trust him in that.

Obviously, we want to make wise decisions.

And I kept saying, based on how the pregnancy is going, it makes perfect sense for me to be able to do this at home.

But I was like, but if anything were to happen, we're not going to blame it on the fact that we had a home birth.

We have to just trust that if anything does happen, that was the Lord's plan for us, and that he chose that for us.

So I think that just helped bring a piece to knowing, all right, he's in control, and whatever happens, he's just going to take control of that, and we're going to be able to go through it because he's giving us the means to do that.

He's given us his word.

He's given us prayer in the body of Christ.

He's given us things that we can use to get through trials.

So we were like, we know that whatever happens, we're going to be okay.

And so I think that just helped us have a piece about the whole situation, but then too, just knowing he has created our bodies, to be able to do this, and he has formed everything so beautifully.

And I think it just made it so much more clear by having a home birth that I was just like, wow, he made everything to dysfunction so seamlessly.

And obviously, there can be complications, and things can happen, but just seeing everything work out so well when the midwife wasn't there, I mean, wow, that was the Lord.

He had his hand over us and was just caring for each step of the way and knowing, all right, all these things are going to happen like this because you guys are going to be alone.

And so just knowing that he took care of us in that and everything was, yeah, really, really great.

So we're super thankful for that.

That's beautiful.

So if he nursed right away, then is nursing going well then?

Yeah, yeah, it was going, it's been going well and it did go well like from since the beginning.

And that was interesting because I did so much like research and study and like preparation for the birth, but I didn't do a lot for like postpartum or nursing, which like definitely I think people should do because I did not do that.

I was just so focused on like this birth has to like, I have to be prepared, but I just didn't like I had read some things about postpartum and nursing and I had talked to like my mom a little bit about it, but I definitely hadn't studied it or like research it to the extent that I would have wanted to.

So I'm very thankful that he did latch right away and that he was doing well, but there was it was kind of a rocky like beginning just in the sense of I was like, I don't know what I'm doing.

Like I was like, I just don't know like how this works or like if he is latching.

Well, like I like he did, but I just didn't know if he did like I was just kind of like, I don't know what's going on.

But but yeah, so it went well.

I think the more rocky part about it was like he would sleep so much and I was just kind of like, Oh, just let it go.

Like he's fine.

Like he doesn't need to eat or he'll be fine.

And he was fine.

But I think I had to learn like, okay, like he's a newborn.

He doesn't know when to wake up and like when to be asleep and when to eat and whatever.

So just having to learn how to do all that.

How big was he?

He was seven pounds, 15 ounces.

Yeah, I was going to say because I know sometimes like preemies like little babies will struggle with, you know, figuring out when to wake up and stuff.

But usually full term babies are pretty good at it.

Yeah, like he figured out definitely like even just like the first week he got the hang of it.

But it was the first couple of days that and I think a lot of it was because of like we had so many visitors and they were all like holding him and I was just kind of like, oh yeah, he's asleep.

Like, well, just leave it.

But yeah, just learning to kind of be like, all right, no, like he actually has to like eat now and do this and that.

So I was just kind of in a daze.

But yeah, having gone through this now, your first pregnancy and your first delivery and now you're, let's see, two months postpartum, basically.

Pretty much.

Yeah.

Do you have any advice for some other first time moms out there?

I think kind of what I was saying is just, yeah, like really prepare yourself and do a lot of research and do a lot of like educating things.

I think I've had some other friends who, because they're first time moms, they'll be like, I'm just going to like wing it.

Like it'll just, we'll just go to the hospital, do this.

Like it's just going to happen.

And it's like, okay, but like, wouldn't you like to know, like what's best and like how to help make this scenario better?

And even just I've talked to a lot of my friends right now who don't have kids yet.

And I've said like, hey, even start educating yourself now because even the way you're living now can really impact the way your pregnancy is going to go.

Like what you're eating now is going to be really, really important.

Like you don't want to just get pregnant and then be like, oh, let me now figure out how to take care of myself.

And it's like that entering a pregnancy without preparing yourself beforehand could lead to a lot of complications.

So kind of telling people different things like that.

But to like, I think one of the biggest things that we learned is kind of what I just said, where I prepared so much for the birth, which I think is really important and you should do, but also prepare for like what's after.

I didn't do a lot of preparation for postpartum, and I think it went really well, thankfully.

But even then, it's like we had a lot of people over like the first couple of days, which was just super exhausting.

And we definitely needed to like take some time to ourselves, and like we should have just been slower on that end.

And I think because we had our baby at home, we just thought like, oh, it's fine, people can just come over whenever, and like it's going to be good.

And both of us just love being around people, which is great.

But we also had to learn like, oh, we're sleep deprived.

And we also like haven't had a lot of time with our own baby, and like we need that, and like that's good for him, and he needs to nurse, and he needs to like figure these things out.

And I need to figure these things out.

And even just like for Luke, like he was doing a lot of hosting, which is like, you're not like he's a new dad, like he doesn't need to be like hosting people.

So both of us, like after a few days in, we were like, we need to just like take some time for ourselves, like and not have people over anymore.

So yeah, just even preparing yourself for that, and preparing yourself for like, okay, there is going to be a lot of new things happening, and like things that you've never experienced before.

And so like, you just have to take the time to learn it, and like it's okay to just like really take that time and take those days really slowly.

Instead of thinking like we have to figure this out, like we have to have people over, and like everything's going to be normal.

It's like, no, like this is super new.

It doesn't have to be normal.

So that was a big thing we learned, and I'd probably suggest.

I agree.

We did things similar to you for our first one, and we very much changed them the second go-round.

Yeah, we even talked already about, and even within that first week, Luke was kind of like, hey, when people come over, let's give them specific times that they need to be here.

Not just when they come, but also a specific time.

When they leave.

Yeah.

And he was like, not because we don't enjoy being with people, but we need that space, we need that time.

And he even said, let's also just pick a specific time of each day where we're going to just close the door to the room and be completely ourselves.

Because we did have some people staying with us to help us out.

His mom was staying with us for a couple of days, and my sisters would stay with us for a couple of days to help us out.

Which was really sweet, but even then, it was like, let's just take an hour or two each day to not have anyone around and just close the door to our room and just be together and be with our baby and spend that quiet time together, which was so helpful once we started doing that.

But it is one of those things where I wish we had done that sooner.

I'm sure it helped bond the three of you together as a family.

Oh yeah, for sure.

And I think it's just hard too, because I am not a super emotional person, and postpartum just makes you emotional.

And so I wanted to be emotional and wanted to let a lot out, but I also didn't want to be that way around people, because I'm just not that way.

So there was just a lot of bottle of emotions, and then at night when we'd go to bed, I'd just let it all out.

And Luke would be like, whoa, I didn't know all this was going on.

And I was like, yeah, this is just a lot.

But after we started spending each day a little bit more slowly and spending time together, it was just like, hey, these are the things I'm struggling with today, or this is how I'm feeling right now.

And so it was just kind of helpful for him to kind of get traction on that beforehand instead of at night just getting this whole flood of emotions.

So yeah, it was good though.

Keeping that open line of communication all day long.

Yeah, exactly.

No, it was a lot of learning.

And I think still there's so many things that we're learning, and I know we will be learning for the rest of our lives as parents.

But I think it's just super sweet to know that the Lord is in control of all the little things.

When the baby's crying a lot, it can stress me out so much.

And I'm just like, I don't know what to do.

What's wrong with him?

Why is he crying?

And so many times, Luke has just like, trust the Lord.

He's a baby.

He's going to cry.

This is fine.

He's like, obviously, try to do what you can, but sometimes this is just how they are, you know?

So, yeah, just taking things slow really, really helps and trusting the Lord in all of that process.

Well, Leslie, thank you so much for coming on and sharing your story.

I really, really enjoyed listening to it.

Thank you.

Yeah, this is super fun.

Thanks again for joining us today.

You can reach me at Surrendered Birth Services on Instagram or email me at contact at surrenderedbirthservices.com.

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